With pictures.
In TECHNICOLOR!!!!
The Puget Sound has its own special color palate, green and grey. Green trees, green moss, green lawns....and everything else grey.
But that's not why you are here is it? Let's talk about the important part, how I got here.
So, the pantie sniffers were using their "lets look at everyones butts in black and white" machine today. So security was a special sort of Hell. I cannot express just how little respect I have for TSA. While waiting for 3 of them to pause their conversation about NCAA brackets long enough to give my drivers license the 3rd degree, not boarding pass mind you as I use the iPhone version and apparently they are not allowed to touch your phone, I started looking at the multitude milling around. Where the Hell do they get these people?!? I have seen more professional looking people serving coffee at Denny's!! And to work at Denny's I'm pretty sure you have to have a tattoo of at least one star on your neck, or a rose on your left boob, or at least one teardrop in the corner of your eye! These jack-offs are Federal officers??? And who exactly is Bertha the 300lb asthmatic supposed to be able to take down (except me I guess)?? Eh, it's OK. I'll protest by packing my dirty underwear, inside out, in the very top of my suitcase on the trip home. Every time I find one of their little love notes in my bag on a return trip it makes me giggle. So I'm a sick bastard. Sue me.
I had a little over an hour to kill before boarding today. So, I decided to get my shoes shined! There is something absolutely fantastic about an airport shoeshine. First, and I guess this stems from my military days, SOMEBODY ELSE is shining my shoes! Oh, lets not kid, I didn't shine my own boots when I was in. Well blackened the regulation read! And thank goodness for patent leather dress shoes! Second, you are sitting on a throne far above everyone else, looking down at the top of their pointed little heads (the effect is magnified at SLC concourse C with its sloped ramp), while a small man with a weak grasp of English attempts to make small talk as he's rubbing brown goo on your feet....wait, what? Lastly, it's kind of like a foot rub with snapping towel sounds! So, here are the results!
Afterwards, I needed food. Squatters in the C concourse is kind of my standby, but I decided to branch out today. Not far of a branch mind you as there are only 3 restaurants on that particular concourse but a branching none the less. Soup sounded good, so I ordered a bowl of the Butternut Squash. The soup came out and I thought to myself, "Self, who serves Butternut Squash soup with tortillas in it?" I proceeded to pick out the floating goat cheese on top (another clue....) just as the counter help came running out saying "I gave you the wrong soup!" An honest mistake, except for the fact that THERE WERE ONLY TWO CHOICES!!!!! 50 / 50 chance of actually getting my order right and they blew it. Even if you take size choices into account, the had a 1 in 4 opportunity to get it right just on raw statistical chance. Sigh, who says service is dead in America.
The flight was pretty much unremarkable, which in and of it's self is pretty damn remarkable! As far as I can tell, Delta Connection has absorbed two regional carriers, Sky West and Masaba. Sky West, after years of mediocrity, is pretty good to fly. CRJ's (900 today, hello first class!) and relatively decent service. Masaba, on the other hand, is pretty much the in air version of Greyhound. No, wait, that's not fair to Greyhound. The flight attendants are, as far as I can tell, TSA rejects. Surly, arrogant, rude, with an average weight of about "oh my god, you just made the aircraft roll 4 degrees by moving from one side to the other!" Nothing quite like having blue polyester stretched tight over the bulbous ass of a bad tempered sky Nazi sliding across you arm because she can't fit through the aisle without turning sideways. And I really believe that they intentionally ram people with the cart just for fun. I cringe every time I'm booked on a Delta Connection flight east of Colorado!!
Now on to the car. I have just started using National Rental Emerald Aisle service since starting with my current company, after years of using Avis and Hertz. I LOVE IT. You walk past the counter and its associated lines, and pick the car you want off the aisle. Today I grabbed a Jeep Grand Cherokee. I want one! I think that it will be the next car I buy for the wife!! But the service!, No boards (AVIS and Hertz), no god awful lines (Hertz), just grab it and go, checking out at the exit gate. Highly recommend!
Finally, hotel. And this will be a recurring theme, Hampton Inn. Not super fancy, but you know EXACTLY what your going to get.
So the particulars for this trip
SLC - SEA
Carrier Delta Connection 8/10
Class First
Equipment CRJ 900
Seat 2A
Rental Co National 8/10
Class Emerald Aisle
Equipment Jeep Grand Cherokee
Hotel Hampton Inn 7/10
Bellingham Intl Airport
Room 441
Well, there it is, my first official trip summary. Let me know if I should keep this thing going or if I'm just wasting my time!!
If not, then see ya next week on the SLC - OAK Napa/Fresno/Walnut Creek adventure!
Heres wishing you no turbulence and lots of complementary drinks!
P.S. One last shot I took while driving up here. I took Chuckanut Drive from Mt. Vernon to Bellingham. If your making the drive, its day, your not in a hurry, and have the choice between I-5 and Chuckanut, take Chuckanut! It's a two lane that winds up the coast. Little oyster houses and scenic pull offs all the way up. It's gorgeous. Both the pic at the beginning of this post and this one were taken on the drive today.
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